When Progress Isn’t Enough
Why?
Hey y’all! Guess it’s finally time to kick off my personal Substack, not to be confused with my OTHER Substack (Subscribe if you haven’t):
I’ve been thinking a lot about this thing that people do, especially online, in which nothing is ever good enough. I think we’ve all been guilty of it at times. Things are in shambles and when someone unexpectedly takes a progressive stance or presents a new solution, there is always someone (or many someones) that come along and pick it apart, all the while not having anything constructive to contribute. (And I’m not talking about what is happening in the White House — that’s a dumpster fire.)
What is that called?
Why are we so obsessed with the negative outlook on everything?
Why can't we celebrate small wins?
Why do we pick apart the only solution on the table instead of building on it?
It may not be perfect, but it's a start.
For example, recently, Harvard University took a public stance: it refused to comply with the Trump Administration’s policy demands around DEI initiatives, on-campus protests, etc. In response, the administration announced it would freeze $2.2 billion in grants and $60 million in contract funding.
While I did see a lot of people celebrating Harvard standing ten toes down (as the kids say), there are always a handful of “WELL ACTUALLYs.”
Well actually, back in 16hundredandsomethingorother Harvard used slave labor to build it’s campus.
Well actually, Harvard boosted the University with funds earned from slave trading.
The same Harvard that didn’t let Black people attend until 19whateveryearthatwas?!?
Of course Harvard has a racist past. Almost every institution in this country does. My question is, can they evolve? Should they cave to Trump? And had they caved to Trump we would complain about that too. I’m not sure what solution we are looking for and going to be ok with.
There’s no single term for this phenomenon, but I did a little independent research and found that it intersects with a few key ideas:
Purity Politics
The belief that if a person, solution, or organization isn’t perfectly aligned with every ideal, it’s not valid. In activism, culture, and politics, this leads to tearing down imperfect progress instead of improving or iterating on it.
Negativity Bias
A psychological tendency to focus more on what's wrong than what's right. Our brains are wired to protect us from harm, so we scan for flaws, threats, or risks, even when good is present. In community or cultural discourse, this shows up as hyper-scrutiny of progress instead of celebration of wins.
“Progress Paralysis” or “Analysis Paralysis” by Critique
Solutions get stalled or dismissed not because they don’t work, but because they don’t work for everyone, all at once, or in the ideal way. It keeps us stuck, especially in social good spaces.
“Crabs in a Barrel” Mentality
Especially in marginalized communities, scarcity and systemic trauma can condition people to pull down even well-intentioned progress, fearing that someone else’s shine will reduce their own power—or that being hopeful is naive.
Why are we so obsessed with the negative?
We’re Exhausted.
Burnout makes optimism feel fake. When systems keep failing us, it feels safer to preemptively reject progress than risk disappointment again.We Mistake Critique for Care.
We’ve been conditioned to believe that “calling out” = accountability = progress. Sometimes that’s true. But critique without contribution just becomes noise.We Lack Trust.
People have been burned so many times—by institutions, leaders, movements—that skepticism becomes a form of self-protection. But it also means we resist collective momentum because we expect failure.Performative Smartness.
On social platforms especially, it’s easier (and often rewarded) to sound smart by being critical, cynical, or contrarian than by being curious, hopeful, or collaborative.
So why can’t we celebrate small wins?
Because celebration requires:
Hope (which feels vulnerable)
Patience (which feels passive in a crisis)
And trust in imperfection (which feels risky)
But honestly, most transformative change starts messy. If there were a book written about my life, f*ck a chapter, the title would probably be “Get Uncomfortable,” because change is messy and uncomfortable.
And the real work is not in rejecting imperfection, but in shaping it into something better.
So I challenge you—before you fix your lips to criticize or let your fingers fire off a nonconstructive take at someone offering a new idea or turning over a new leaf—pause. Soften your heart. Ask yourself if you’re offering anything but resistance. Then choose grace. Choose understanding. And if you must speak, let it be in the direction of something useful. Because tearing down is easy. But building—especially in public—is difficult ass work.
This is as much a note to myself as it is to the world.